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I don't know about you but I am not always comfortable with giving absolutes. The moments this discomfort is most pronounced is when my children ask me for something (a new toy, money for new things, or some sort of plan regarding an activity). It's hard for me to give absolutes and makes me wonder where that resistance and discomfort came from. Part of my discomfort with giving my children absolutes is because I do not like telling them "No" unless of course it is to discipline them. I desire to almost always say "Yes" when they want a new toy, go on a weekend trip, visit with their grandparents or cousins, or to go out to a nice restaurant.

Being BLACK or WHITE, up or down, left or right, honest or lying has made me feel oh so uncomfortable. Like there are so many variables and options and possibilities. But I am learning about the value & power of choosing a complete side.

Writing this post was extremely helpful. God is revealing to me as I typed this blog that my discomfort and resistance to giving absolute "No's" is rooted in my experience of being sexually assaulted, rejected, dismissed or humiliated. My "No" then was meaningless. Nothing changed when I had those experiences and I voiced opposition, an absolute "No" or displayed discomfort. So, my brain registered & interpreted any absolute word or opinion being worthless. But today is a new day!

I am so overwhelmed with gratitude at how God continues to restore me after trauma!

This is my story and it's not over yet! God wants to give us each the opportunity to see ourselves winning! I believe that God desires so deeply to restore us back to a place where we first were before you & I witnessed or experienced anything traumatic (loss of a child, abuse, addiction, eviction, murder, poverty, chronic illness, violence, war, immigration issues etc)!

The problem is, that most of us are trying to achieve the gold medal, the 4.0, perfection, healing, deliverance, freedom and/or an absolute win on our own terms. We are trying to grasp the win with a lot of topical methods,activities, materials, and treatments. When Jesus scolded the disciples for not healing the epileptic boy in the New Testament (see below), He didn't say "You forgot to wipe him down with anointing oil!", "You should have made him drink lemon cucumber water 7 days in a row before attempting to heal the boy!", and/or "You failed at healing him because you yourself did not abstain from fish sandwiches & sour patch kids for 21 days prior to laying hands on the boy!"

NO! Jesus said in Matthew 17:21 in the International Children’s Bible "[That kind of spirit comes out ONLY if you use prayer and give up eating.]”[a]". Jesus did not instruct the disciples to make sure they prepared for the healing with superficial methods. He instructed them to get their mind, body, and soul in a posture of reverence and humility so that God could work through them to heal the boy!

I'm not sure what issue you are working through in your life. But maybe it's time to do some serious/intentional fasting and prayer. Seek God for what kind of fast. Because honestly most of us think fasting is either meaningless, are afraid to go without food for long periods of time, or have no idea that food is not the substance to fast from. Maybe it's complaining or watching TV or scrolling on social media to fast from. God truly knows our heart and therefore He knows where our treasure is!

I could not wrap up the bounty of this message with mere typing so I shot this quick video to couple with the written word! I love you all -

be the salt, be the life, and be the love that Jesus Christ has empowered you to be!

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