That moment when there is a knock on your door, you ask who is there and it's OPPORTUNITY! Like a BIG opportunity, like the type of opportunity that in another life you would not even consider praying about! But because you live in this life now. This new life as disciples of Christ. Because you live with an urgency to seek God first (Matthew 6:33) even when it seems unnecessary; you ask God about the opportunity. And you wait for an answer.
Seeking God leaves us vulnerable. Completely open to the answer God provides. And potentially heartbroken when God speaks and we disagree with His answer.
At one point in my life, I would just go here, do that, participate in this blah blah blah. No known clear direction for my life. Then in 2008 I stumbled on Matthew 6. I read the entire chapter and was blown away. The fact that The Lord would leave this kind of blueprint is amazing. Literal keys to His Kingdom! In this chapter it considers so many issues of life and closes with a BUT.
A but so big (lol) that I could not deny it.
But seeking God first as I shared earlier was not part of my plan. I wasn't taught to seek God first and I was raised in the pew. I had no idea how seeking God first would disrupt my groove. Seeking God first is certainly disruptive but in my experience the disruption is legendary, necessary, and has eternal benefits.
Asking God what to do and when to do it and then waiting for God's answer seems ludacris to most people. We are so brilliant, ready to seize amazing opportunities, we are content matter experts, and we know how to access resources. It doesn't make sense to seek God for an answer we can come up with in our sleep!
It's not that we aren't able to come up with good ideas or that we lack sound decision making skills. Seeking God first is about humility & submission. It is about naming & noticing God as our Perfect Supreme Being that is leading and directing us on a perfect journey filled with lots of imperfections.
When I seek God first I do experience a level of uncertainty and find myself hoping that God's choice for me mirrors what I desire. But what happens when God's plan, His immediate answer does not match our desire at all? What if God's answer breaks our heart? What if God's answer brings up painful memories? What if? I have experienced all of these responses to God's answers. The heartbreak, the memory of trauma, and the awkwardness that comes with recklessly abandoning your dream for God's perfect plan! Been there. Done that and am willing to do it again.
So, here's the deal; when I do seek God and follow His plan what I know for sure is that His answer comes with peace! A peace that has nothing to do with my current circumstance. I'm sure about that! I'm sure about how awkward it is too seek God first when you're well equipped to take on terrible challenges! I'm sure about the risk taken when we leave an important decision in the hands of The Most High God, whom we have not seen or touched personally!
But I'm also sure about His peace, safety, the prize, unlimited resources, and providence that comes with whatever answer God provides! I'm sure about how well my soul is after getting the answer from The Lord. Real talk, my soul being well when God's answer differs from mine is not immediate, but I know it's coming!
Praying & then waiting for God's answer is good for the mind, body, and soul. Try it today!